To continue the idea of living a fruitful life as explained in 2 Peter 5-7, we actually have to do some work. More than just praying. More than just “practicing patience” by waiting for something to happen. I think we often confuse the idea of powerlessness and surrendering our life to God with inactivity and laziness.
Are you relying on God to give you the right job by sitting in front of the television watching the latest ‘dancing with the stars’? Perhaps focussing on Ashton joining the cast of ‘2 and a half men’ and how freaked Sheen is over the latest news-breaking development? Are you asking God to bring “The One” into your life and then head out to the local bar in hopes of finding him? Yeah…that’s not what surrender means.
We can say we have faith, goodness and we are seeking knowledge. Now to gain self-knowledge and bleed that into self-control. We can do this by owning our feelings, not to deaden them or numb them with material things, ie. drugs, drinks and doo-dads (and don’t forget dairy queen!) We need to name it, claim it, then dump it. By turning our thoughts to our own feelings and ignoring outside distractions we can develop a more attune sense of right and wrong.
I think of it as as keeping your side of the street clean. And don’t focus on anyone else’s side. It is not your business what others think of you. I, for one, have enough things to do keeping my side of the street clean without worrying about what is going on at the neighbor’s house. When we habitually name it, claim it and dump it, all we do to persevere is do the same thing as the day before. We can reverse the order of our destiny. By learning self-control we gain power in God. Then we are on the road to freedom and happy destiny.

Life sucks when it has no purpose. I know. I lived in the land of suckiness for a very long time. Going to God with my hand out, palm up, forever asking, why not me? When am I going to get what I want and at the precise time I want it? For most of my young adult (heck, let’s be real and my mid-adult life) I most often resembled Veruca Salt…”I want an oompa loompa now!” in a seething, annoyed voice and would guffaw at the mere thought of having to actually work for something. I would pray every night to wake up thin, bartering with God for a boyfriend or to win the lottery…thinking all of these worldly things of least importance was just the thing I needed to fill the emptiness in the pit of my stomach, not realizing that feeling was actually absence of a real relationship with God.

One of my favorite verses in the bible is 2 Peter 5:11 because it so clearly states what I need to strive for to become the person God needs me to be in order to live effectively. “Make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness and to godliness, brotherly kindness and to brotherly kindness, love.

We trick ourselves into thinking believing in God and going to church is enough. We trick ourselves into thinking our volunteer hours are enough. They aren’t. We need to constantly be striving for knowledge, however that looks for you; perhaps a new book, a different song or talking with someone who has peace and serenity in their eyes and ask them how they got it.

To have the faith first, then desire to be good and seek the knowledge to be better are the first three steps to living a fruitful life. Taking these steps in manageable bite size pieces allows me to follow through with the tasks at hand. After the habit of the first three, we have the courage to tackle the rest.

Psalms 27:1 The Lord is my light and my salvation-whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life-of whom shall I be afraid?

I admit it. A big fear of mine is disapproval. How will I be seen by others? The biggest lesson I’ve had in the last 6 months is that I cannot afford to be self-seeking. This is not the same as being selfish, although I battle selfishness as well. I cannot afford to seek approval in order to feel good about myself. I cannot afford to be performance based instead of biblically based.
We are continually getting messages from society starting at a really young age (Hello Disney!) Messages that I need to care about being the most intelligent, the prettiest, the most thoughtful and understanding person in the room. This is a misnomer. Not because it isn’t good to be intelligent and pretty and thoughtful and understanding, those are very good qualities to strive for, but as women in general and in ministry specifically, we get into a cycle of competition and rivalry that goes against what God’s vision is for our lives.

The reason I can’t care what others think of me is because when I am self-seeking my focus is either on me or you or the lady down the road with the bmw and the mba able to get a tcby (are those yogurt stands even still around?) without gaining an ounce and not on who the focus needs to be on: God and the people far from him.

So I think of Psalms 27:1 when I get caught in the trap of seeking outside approval. I key back into the mission God has called me to, keying into where I fit at church, at home, at work. In the end I am just one small person in one small church in one small city in one small state in one small country in one small continent in one small world. It’s not so scary when I remember my place. I can be excellent for God, not for anyone else.

Hannah was a woman who desperately wanted to celebrate Mother’s day. Her rival, Peninah (her husband’s other wife) would hassle her so much, ridicule her for having a closed womb, That it would drive Hannah to tears every time they went to worship and give their tithe. The priest, Eli, saw her at the temple and tried throwing her out because he thought she was drunk. “Not so, I am a woman deeply troubled…I have been praying here out of my great anguish and grief.” So Eli tells her to go in peace and may the Lord grant what she asks.

So “in the course of time” (translation-not our time but God’s) Hannah conceived and gave birth. Oh happy day!

But then Hannah does something I find extraordinary. She brings him to the temple to be raised by the priests. “I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of him. So now I give him to the Lord. For his whole life he will be given over to the Lord.” Now that takes faith. Hannah’s child was Samuel who became a great prophet and last judge whom God spoke to and through.

In this day and age with procedures and pills and adoption and surrogates, have we forgotten about the power of God? Do we think the power of God needs help, that we on Earth can do a better job than He?

Our children do not belong to us. They belong to God; we are only stewards of his family. May we learn and continue to be good stewards of all He has given us.

I sometimes get overly sensitive and begin to harbor judgment against others’ behaviors; my husband not complimenting me enough (is there ever enough compliments?), my mother in law telling me yet again that low-fat ice cream is good for me because it’s made with milk, a smile from someone you know talks about you behind your back (the bigger the smile, the bigger the backstab-just sayin’.)

Minor annoyances get bigger than life if not nipped immediately at the first thought. I cannot afford to harbor judgmental thinking. To judge is to give an authoritative opinion according to Merriam-Webster. I understand I am allowed opinions, I can make decisions. This is the beauty of free will. But truthfully, I am not of any authority over anyone else even if I am their supervisor or elder. I can hold people accountable to a high standard of living, but the only real authority is God.

Obadiah 3 says, “The pride of your heart has deceived you. Though you soar like the eagle and make your nest among stars from there I will bring you down, declares the Lord.” I am appreciative of the humble reminders I get from God when I get too caught up in my way or the highway mentality.

May I be open-minded and willing to listen to other’s viewpoint. I pray to remember I am not in control and that only Jesus can solve any spiritual problems either myself or anyone else may have.

A quickening heartbeat. A silent breath. A daydream of ‘what if.’

I grew up with a loving family, good friends and my needs with plenty of wants all met. I wasn’t abused or neglected or bullied. The potential my life had was sickening. And I was wasting it away feeling sorry for myself and being horribly lonely.

To get past my hurts I needed to admit I felt horrible, I needed to get out of the denial, out of the numbing behaviors of gossip rags and spending and eating. I consumed so I wouldn’t have to think. In Lamentations 2:18 it reads “The hearts of the people cry out to the Lord. O wall of the Daughter of Zion, let your tears flow like a river day and night; give yourself no relief, your eyes no rest.” I needed to recognize my grief and my anger at God. He knew what was in my shameful heart anyway; I just needed to finally admit it.

Once the admission of grief and hopelessness was given up and surrendered to God, miracles began to happen. It truly was like the next chapter in Lamentations 3:24, “I say to myself, “the Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.” God is all I need to get me through the day. I pray for the ability to carry out His will in my life, for His will to be my focus. Life began to get better because of the continual surrender process; there is safety in hope instead of a ‘waiting for the other shoe to drop’ pessimism.

We can be filled up daily. “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” Lam 3:22-23. Hope cannot be forced but if we surrender despair, hope fulfills these promises.

Vision-Courage-Commitment-Development-Vision Continuous:

This list seems to be a progressive yet cyclic process. If you are not satisfied with the life you lead or have plans you can never follow through on, try creating a Vision (a picture of the future that inspires passion,) and then break it down into pieces.

Pray first for the courage to become willing, and then Commit to it by telling God, telling others and reminding yourself of what you hope to achieve.

Development takes practice and work and follow-through (and continued courage and passion!) I usually go into major research mode. I require a lot of writing, reading and talking with other people about what I saw, not to mention praying (and then actually waiting for the answer!)

Development intuitively inspires the snowball effect of joining with others’ Visions and creating new Visions to further the path of achievement. The latest Vision then needs Courage, Commitment and Development to fuel further success.

I pray daily for Courage to Commit, I work daily on Development and the part that makes it all worthwhile is seeing the Vision take a life of its own… that is when I realize it’s not really my Vision and never was.

Vacuous: Empty, vacant, blank; to be dull and stupid. (Merriam-Webster Dictionary, 1997.)

My life was vacuous in my teens and twenties. I was vacuous. Not all the time, sure, there were moments when I studied hard, lived well, was helpful to my family. But if I can be perfectly honest, much of the time I was centered and focused only on my needs, my feelings and because I had no direction I was seeking out what I thought I needed from the T.V., the malls and the assumption that if everyone knew my name at the local bar it meant I was loved; that lifestyle left me feeling vacuous.

To see change I had to be changed. New experiences gave me new hope. How and where do we find hope? I found mine in a tiny little church, in a tiny little town on a tiny little lake. A place where it’s okay not to be okay. I was encouraged to do something important with my one and only life. I was taught how to love, be loved and fear little.

You can’t always get what you want. Why is this so hard to accept? Further, why do I always hear the Rolling Stones when I say that?

In James 4:1-3 he explains it like this: “You do not have, because you do not ask God. When you ask you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.”

I spent many wasted energies, time and money on my own pleasures with no thought of anyone or anything else. If I saw something I wanted; a new Ben and Jerry’s flavor or the latest i-whatever, my thoughts and time went to how I was going to get whatever I wanted. The horrible thing about getting what I want when I wanted it is the irony of not being satisfied. Ever. There was always more to want, more to get, which created a misuse of my energy misuse of my attitude and discontent with my many blessings.

So, are we to accept that we can’t always get what we want? Or can we change what we want? I taught a lesson in Sunday school this winter on Self-Control-being happy even when we don’t get our way. I explained it to the kid’s like this: The trick is to have what I want be the same as what God wants and it will be blessed and I will be happy. Simple but not always Easy.

To think of God’s will first helps me get out of my junk, the self-pity, the discouragement and the self-seeking and opens me up to my purpose, my strength and the real point of it all.